Everything is awful and I’m not OK

Questions for the New Mother to Ask Before Giving Up

Are you hydrated?  If not, have a glass of water. Try to have one every time you feed baby.

Have you eaten in the past three hours?  If not, get some food — something with protein, not just simple carbs.  Perhaps some nuts or hummus?

Have you showered in the past day?  If not, take a shower right now. Your baby will be ok for 15 minutes in his bed. If you have older kids, it’s ok to use the TV for short periods of time (or longer, if you’re desperate!).

If daytime: are you dressed?  If not, put on clean clothes that aren’t pajamas. Give yourself permission to wear something special, even if you’re not going out that day.

Have you stretched your legs in the past day?  Get outside if possible! If not, try to make it to the mall or even a quick trip to Target (once your body is adequately healed). Dance to some music, or do some stretches or yoga. Anything to get your body moving.

Have you said something nice to someone in the past day?  Do so, whether online or in person.  Make it genuine; wait until you see something really wonderful about someone, and tell them about it.

Have you cuddled a living being besides your newborn in the past two days?  If not, do so.  Don’t be afraid to ask for hugs from your older kids, partner, your friends or friends’ pets.  Most of them will enjoy the cuddles too; you’re not imposing on them.

Do you feel ineffective?  Pause right now and get something small completed, whether it’s responding to an e-mail, loading up the dishwasher, or packing your diaper bag for your next trip out. Good job!

Do you feel unattractive?  Take a selfie and post it on Facebook! Your friends will remind you how great you look, and you’ll fight society’s restrictions on what beauty can look like.

Do you feel overwhelmed and anxious?  Give yourself ten minutes to sit back and figure out a game plan for the day.Take some deep breaths, and remind yourself that you’ve got this. Call in support if you need it! Again, your baby will be ok in his bed for fifteen minutes if you need to step away and take a breather.

Have you waited a week?  Maybe your baby is in a Wonder Week (developmental leap that causes fussiness in some babies). Sometimes our perception of life is skewed, and we can’t even tell that we’re not thinking clearly. It happens. Keep yourself going for a full week, whatever it takes, and see if you still feel the same way then.

You’ve made it this far, and you will make it through. You are stronger than you think.

Adapted from: http://eponis.tumblr.com/post/113798088670/everything-is-awful-and-im-not-okay-questions-to

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